Monday, September 19, 2011

dislike

Last week left me feeling completely drained and defeated.

I failed at something. Not just "didn't do well", but literally failed. And it was something really important (like graduating or not graduating important). I've failed at lots of things, but never at art history. I don't really know what to think now... only that I remember why I have a sever love-hate relationship with grad school.

And (it doesn't need to be said, because it's always the case) I've been feeling totally lost in my classes - like, the dumbest one there. I guess I'm just not completely invested in school this semester...maybe it's due to the fact that I'm trying frantically to write my thesis; or maybe it's that I would rather watch a movie with the husband than think about school.

That really took the "happy" out of last week.

So you can imagine how pleasantly surprised when I came home after teaching my class on Friday to find Jantz all dressed up (in my favorite shirt of his) with surprise reservations to PF Changs (after a quick stop at a friend's birthday party). It was seriously exactly what I needed. It may have even been better than flowers (but don't tell him that haha).

Basically, this semester is proving to be the hardest. I just have to believe that somehow I'll make it through. If it wasn't for the class I'm teaching (I think I'm falling more in love with teaching by the week), I may not be able to make it through. It's nice knowing that what i want to end up doing is actually something I enjoy doing...it makes all this stress seem like it will be worth it when it's over.

Here's some more pictures of the wedding (that also happen to cheer me up). we've now passed the one month mark (woot). Jantz loves the picture of our rings:



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