want another video? this ones for the holidays

I'm pretty jealous of everyone in this eating area. (and now that i know how to put in videos, i might have to do it more often...)




And a late Merry Christmas and early Happy New Years! I hope everyone had so much fun and ate a ton of delicious food (I definitely did!).

Christmas with the family was so much fun. I have missed them so very much (especially my darling niece, she's the cutest. and i'm not even kidding, so adorable). We were all poor this year so presents were minimal and very creative, which actually was a lot of fun. It really is the thought and effort that makes the holidays special. We ate so many delicious home-cooked meals, mostly just hung out and relaxed. Exactly what I needed. Thanks fam for the presents and love :) and thanks roomies for the cute presents (you're basically my family too)


To top it all off, after the stress and frustration (remember the not-fun money issues?) somehow everything has sorted itself out in the past week. It's kind of funny how it was all taken away (enter: frantic ali), and then all given back again a short time later (enter: very happy and grateful ali). All I can say is, what a relief. And holy cow do I feel blessed. So grateful that things work out when I least expect it.

There's pretty slim chances I'll be posting again until after the new year since I've be traipsing around town with that silly boyfriend of mine. We got to do Christmas all over again because we weren't together for the real thing. He got me some really cute presents. He knows how to shop :) And I think he liked what I got him.

I'll be back next week, probably droning on about how hard school is. haha, but hopefully with some fun stories and pictures.

On a completely unrelated note...I need a haircut. bad.

Thought of You

Just wanted to share.

This video was made by two faculty members, one in animation and one in dance, at BYU. Amazing is all I have to say. love the music. love the animation.





Thought of You from Ryan J Woodward on Vimeo.

 

non mi piace snow

(or "i don't like snow", in case your Italian skills are rusty ;)   also, "snow doesn't please me" if you're being literal)

It snowed all day yesterday. and I was hoping for just rain today......but oh no. It snowed all night, leaving A LOT of freaking snow everywhere. Oh, and it's snowing right now. It may never stop.

I guess that wouldn't be so bad, only because it would mean Ria, B, and i (and Derek too) could finally make a sweet-awesome igloo/tunnel on our balcony. but that is the only good thing that can come from this snow business.

I took the bus today to escape having to drive myself on the terrifying roads. Now if only the good city of Orem would shovel their sidewalks so i wouldn't have to stomp through a foot of snow to get to the bus stop. enter: moon boots, which made the stomping somewhat entertaining.

I wrapped Christmas presents last night. I feel like I should apologize for the wrapping, and not just to those who receive gifts from me, but to anyone who values good wrapping. You see, I didn't have wrapping paper, and because of previously mentioned snow, there was no way i was going to go buy some. So i used what i had: pink tissue paper and a ton of bubble wrap. I'm not a very good wrapper anyway (not for the lack of much instruction by the parents), so this proved to be pretty exciting and I'm looking forward to watching people unwrap them.

If only the gifts inside made up for that, but i'm pretty terrible at buying gifts for people. I should also be apologizing to anyone who has ever received a present from me. No, your present doesn't mean i hate you, i just didn't know what to get you that adequately shows you how much you really mean to me (which is a lot). I'm trying to get better at this, promise :)

I forgot how much there is to do when school isn't taking up every crevice of my life. I reorganized my room, fixed up my closet and my desk, went through a bunch of old papers, did laundry, used super glue (yeah...that was a big mess), finally changed up this old blog (better? worse? did you even notice? fess up), and wrapped presents :)

Life is going to be so nice for the next two weeks. Christmas couldn't have come at a better time. I was seriously beginning to forget what the real world was like. I've been so consumed with school and doing well and working harder than ever and trying to please my teachers and worrying about money and time and on and on. My mind literally has not been able to breathe and think about things (kind of like being in a tornado for 4 months, and then finally being flung out. and you think, oh yeah, that's what it's like to be still. grad school=tornado); which I've sadly only realized was the case now that school has been out (but, better late than never i suppose). I'm not stressing or thinking about anything related to these things for the next two weeks. I'm just relaxing and remembering how great life is, and how much i love my roommates (and how much i miss hanging out with them), and how excited i am to be with my family for Christmas and with Jantz for New Years :)

grateful

welp, my first semester of grad school is officially over. I turned in my last project today (a 21 page paper, 30 with pictures and bibliography. my other projects included a museum exhibition critique and 30+ page annotated bibliography. oh and paper grading :) .

i am 1/4 of the way done. whoa.

so yes i want to celebrate. and yes i definitely want to get all those piles of books (along with anything resembling school) out of my room, so i can have two weeks of forgetting i even started grad school (because really, who does that?!). and yes i want to go home and lay on the couch and do absolutely nothing. and yes i want to be happy and smile all the while. 

but, instead i sit here, so frustrated i want to bop people on the head (ok maybe not, but that would be funny right?). i'm rarely a big money-stresser, but when i am, i am in a big way and it's not a pretty sight. and it doesn't help when decisions are involved (we're not very good friends either).
 
But details aren't the important part, this post titled grateful for a reason. and that reason is named jantz (aka the best boyfriend ever). he's the one who is always on the receiving end of my disgruntled-ness. he hears every bad thing i have to say about anything and anyone (which isn't a lot, promise). and he most especially is always the one who has to put up with my bad moods when any of these things occur. he's a good sport, to say the least. and today is no exception.

i'm grateful for his kind words. his assurance that everything is going to work out, not just because he can say it, but because he knows it's the truth. i'm so grateful for the unconditional love he somehow has for me. no matter how angry or sad i am, somehow he always calms me down. and he deserves a big thank you, for reminding me to smile, and to be grateful when i really don't want to :)

alright

first of all, remember when i started going through my Europe trip with pictures, but then i only got through Greece (the first place we went)??? yeah, i'm pretty ashamed. maybe i'll finally get around to do it after finals. mostly i just want to relive all the amazing places i went. i miss traveling around to museums everyday.

secondly, i may have bought a new bed yesterday. i've wanted a new one since i got home from europe. i finally saved enough to buy a really nice one for a really good price (really). after way too many years of sleeping on a twin, i think i deserved the upgrade to a queen. even if it does take up twice as much space. haha. i might just have to post pictures.

but really, SO excited.

and lastly, seriously people, i need to change up my blog. even i don't want to look at it anymore. no more posts until i start! (any ideas for a new title?)

Song-of-the-Week (almost forgot you existed): If I Die Young by The Band Perry. really like this song. the end.

Just a bit more dwelling on being one year older

I must admit I can't believe how fast time has gone. It seems like just yesterday I turned 21, which is when I think life became really exciting (well, exciting/scary/terrible/amazing). Really though, life has only gotten better, even if that has included many failures and wanting to give up on numerous occasions, the good definitely out-ways the bad.

I like that my birthday comes close to Thanksgiving because it gives me extra time to think of all that I'm grateful for. (when i was younger I hated having a fall birthday because it meant i could never go to Seven-Peaks for a party). I really am so grateful for my life right now. School is rough and takes up a lot of my time and energy, but it really is fulfilling. I have the best friends i could ever ask for, including the best roommates Ria and B (we live in the perfect apartment because you are the perfect roommates) and a boyfriend who makes me laugh every single day and who has kept me happier than i ever thought possible.

My year of 22 has been so full. Lots of changes and new things. I finished projects I never thought I could get through, I somehow made it to graduation (still weird to have a diploma), and I even went to Europe (seriously changed my life). Basically, 22 treated me very well and I can't wait to see how 23 turns out.


Is everyone ready for Christmas? for once I am haha

Thanksgiving in Jersey

Here are a few select pictures from the super fun Thanksgiving in
New Jersey with my mom's side of the family :)

making the big dinner :) i stuck with pies, as usual.

after waiting in line for an hour and a half, we finally made it into Carlo's Bakery. 

It was crazy packed, but so worth it.

   

spending a night in new york city. 

(being on the subway really made me miss europe...)

 

a personal fave. opening christmas presents while unaware of pictures being taken.

birthday cake

I turned the big 2-3 on Monday...but, I think I've been telling people I'm 23 for at least a month now. I normally don't approve of broadcasting an age that you are not, but I legitimately thought I was 23. And then my birthday came and I thought, oh yeah, I've been 22 this whole time. hmm. And funnily enough (yes funnily is a word), now that I'm actually 23, I keep forgetting. So, there you go.

Sunday I went out to my dad's. He cooked a huge pizza in his new smoker. I didn't even know that was possible. but it was delicious. We had turtle pie (seriously good) for dessert and i barely blew out the candles - every year my dad gets me trick candles (probably thinking i will have forgotten the past years, which, oddly enough, i usually do), and this time only a couple worked, but instead of lighting back up, they sparked, which caused for some good family laughs. then I got some cute cards from my sister and parents. It was a totally unexpected thing, but it made my birthday that much sweeter.

Then, after saying goodnight to Jantz around 11, I got a call at midnight wishing me my first happy birthday :) I'm still impressed he woke himself up to call me (that boy loves his sleep). he must like me or something...

Monday was one of the most stressful days of the semester (remember my hour-long presentation?). I got up early and prepared all morning (my 9:00 class was canceled) for class at 11. Then I went first (yes, very very first out of everyone) so it was nervous times 10. But of course I played it off totally cool and breezed through the hour (and actually went over a few minutes. yeah, how did that happen??).

After 2 1/2 hours of class, I met with a student who was in desperate need of help with her research paper, which happened to be due that day by 5pm (did I mention my morning was also full of answering frantic emails from what felt like the whole class about said research paper?). After an hour with such a sweet girl who was trying her hardest, I had to rush to work for a meeting. After a few meetings, I was finally able to leave campus.

I took the bus (oh the bus, that's a whole post in itself) to the mall, where I briskly walked to Texas Roadhouse (their opening day was on my birthday! Pretty sure they knew my love for them), where my awesome friends and my mom were waiting. I got to sit and breathe for a few minutes before we were seated and the feasting began. Dinner was soo good. I'm so glad I got to spend some time with all of them, just us, eating and talking and laughing, it was just what i needed after such a long day. And yes, I did have to sit on the saddle thing (in a skirt no less) while everyone made lots of noise. Pictures were taken (of the whole night actually), but i don't have any of them, probably for the best ;)

The party continued at my apartment where a bunch of friends were waiting (thank you everyone for coming!). We played games, ate candy and cake, and hung around and had lots of fun. The cake was soo good (Maria did a wonderful job). There was quite a bit cake-smearing-on-faces (I was so caught of guard, and maria got it all over my face, and in my eye. but i made sure to get her (and bethany) back. birthday tradition, check). which was made extra evident today when i found chocolate cake frosting on my cardigan....guess i failed on the "pretending i'm not wearing the same thing twice" gig, but a cardigan is totally allowed to be worn more than once. just maybe not this time. ha.

I was so exhausted by the end of the day, but I'm so grateful for all of my many friends and family who have been so loving and caring. I don't know if I deserved all the festivities, but thank you all so very much :)

Oh AND, my amazing dad helped me get a new laptop which came in the mail yesterday. I hope it can fill the shoes of my old lappy. I'll be getting used to it over my Thanksgiving in New Jersey (woot!), and hopefully making some changes on this old blog of mine (which I've been trying to do for ages, but never get around to).

ok bye!

updating my blog is totally the same as studying...

Homework has taken over this weekend. I have to give an hour-long presentation on Monday, which is both frightening and exciting. I just want to get it over with, but I think it will be fun to talk about all that I've researched. I'm tracking the scholarship done on Guido Reni, and if you guys don't think that's fascinating, I don't know what will convince you. haha.

Oh and my laptop died on Tuesday. It was pretty devastating. Thankfully (seriously thankfully) all my information survived. But being without a laptop (or moneys) in the midst of grad school is not so good. Good thing my birthday is on Monday...pretty sure I know what my present is going to be.

Last weekend with Jantz was so much fun. We didn't do anything too extravagant, except for a birthday dinner at Cheesecake Factory :) we mostly hung out, watched movies, played random games like War (i've always been really fast at this game, but that boy beats me 90% of the time), chess (my first official game. yeah, he creamed me), and checkers (which I also lost) - my ability to strategize has greatly decreased since high school. And for probably the first time, I didn't take any pictures. for shame.

So I have nothing to spice up this post with......except maybe for one of my many baby pictures that my mom posted on facebook....i think this is a pretty precious one of my dad and i

Hope you're all having a good weekend!

PS. if anyone knows of any job openings in the Utah county area, please let me know! :)

PPS. in the Jewish Bride painting (from my last post), i know it looks like that man is groping the woman, but it was actually a gesture of love and respect. So, it's really a precious couple :)

paintings i'd like to own someday...part 1?

I'm constantly seeing paintings that I fall in love with. But most of them aren't necessarily "hang in your house someday" paintings, they're more like, "stay in the church and come visit often" paintings. So leaving out some that I really love, here's a few that I would pretty much die to see in my house someday. You know, if the museums just decided to let me have them...

Rembrandt's The Jewish Bride

the impasto on this painting is incredible. 

it's what makes it a painting in every sense of the word. 

nothing can compare to seeing this painting in person. seriously. nothing.

Rembrandt's Supper at Emmaus 1629

Caravaggio's Fruit Basket

Vermeer's View of Delft

i also have to say that nothing can compare to seeing this in person. 

it has a luminosity that no one can describe.

it's literally like the painting is lighting up the whole room.

What do all of you decorate your houses with? Art? Pictures? Paint? If my house could be like a 19th century Salon, that would be really cool.

 

it's what day??

it's October 26th. didn't October just start?? the weeks are seriously flying by. but what can i say, time flies when you're busy studying. Is it scary that I've actually sort of enjoyed going to class and doing my homework? because it sort of scares me....I believe this week I even told someone grad school was fun (maybe even twice?!). yeah, whoa.

I'm not gonna lie, it's no walk in the park. I feel like i'm constantly doing homework. reading, writing, study study study. I miss out on a lot of fun, which makes me sad sometimes, but it's pretty much mandatory that I do homework every night, no exceptions (well except for Sundays, that's my "no homework allowed" day. I have to stay sane somehow!).

On a completely different note, I have taken no pictures for a couple weeks, tisk tisk. But, i have been looking at lots of art :) I'm probably going to be writing my thesis on this painting by Guido Reni:

St Joseph with the Infant Jesus, 1635

I actually wrote a little post about this painting (and others) a while ago. Funny how a few months later I found myself writing my senior thesis on it. And now....I may just continue that into my master's thesis. either way, this image will always hold a special place in my heart.

On another completely different note, I get to see the boyfriend next week, yay :)
(yes, he is back)

GNO

"Girls Night Out" for those not properly associated with The Office :)
(not to be confused with GAI, "Guys Afternoon In")

A few of my wonderful past roommates and I got together for a long overdue dinner. I was the "matriarch" of the apartment in our 9 months together a few years back. Seeing how far we've all gotten makes me feel like such a proud mother (...in a "we're still basically the same age but also not" sort of way). They are each doing such amazing things and I feel so lucky to call them friends.

We ate (a lot), talked (even more), and had a whole bunch of fun.

I'm not quite sure how to put in to words all that has happened this week.
Everything has changed. I feel like literally everything is up in the air.
Every day has been a roller coaster of emotions.
But, I'm beginning (only barely) to see a faint light at the end of the dark tunnel.
I don't really know how to talk about it yet, so I'll hold off until things settle a bit.

mish mish

The time has come. I have been both dreading and anticipating its arrival.

My most favorite person in the world, who just so happens to be my boyfriend and best friend (and future husband ;) is leaving for two whole years. to Columbus, Ohio. to serve as a missionary. that means no more phone calls. no more visits. only letters. for the both of us who love and obsess over talking to each other at every possible moment, these two years are going to be quite the experience. But I know that they are going to go. and hopefully it will be more happy than sad. we're going to get through this separated by more than 1700 miles, but we'll be connected through our love and letters. I can't believe this day has finally come. I'm so excited to go through this new adventure with him. I'm so incredibly proud of him for taking such a faith-filled step. all for the benefit of our future and happiness (which i can't wait for).

so please bear with me for the next two years as I mush and gush about how much i miss him and what a wonderful job he is doing.

 just look at these sweet awesome sweatshirts he made for us :)

my week away

My week with Jantz was the best. but pretty much every week with him is the greatest week ever. I only got pictures of the last half while we were in Colorado.

I made oreo truffles. 

jantz even helped, and his turned out the best  

(i've accepted that, even though i LOVE baking, and i'd like to think it's my specialty, that boy can cook, end of story)

i may have gotten some on his face 

(and he didn't even retaliate. wtf right? haha. he'll get me back, don't worry)

driving to the Rockies game. i like watching him drive.

we got sweet awesome seats (5 rows back from 3rd plate). 

Ubaldo was pitching, our fave!

sometimes he makes special faces in pictures

and sometimes i do.

on sunday after his amazing talk in church. 

(ps, i bought him that tie in florence)

him and his sister were making these faces the whole trip! 

our last day we went to lunch at On the Border (and got our meal for free, woot).

 

my favorite picture of us. 

loved the trip.

love him :)

pedro

There is a guy at my work that looks exactly like how Pedro will look in ten years. 

 

seriously.

I'm not sure if i should think it's weird or awesome.

probably both.

pre-post

I had a blog full of pictures all ready to post about my week out of town (which was the BEST), but then by some awesome happening, i erased all the pictures. poopy i know. so until i upload them all again, i'll give you this picture that jantz and his artistic skills created (well, i took the picture, he just awesome-ified it)

i think we're pretty awesome 

(in case you couldn't tell)

cows?

i'm sure you're all well aware of the very large picture of a cow on my blog :) i've thought about it for a while and i think maybe i should replace it with something a little less, "in your face".

I don't really know why there is a cow there in the first place, other than i used to really like cows (also for reasons unknown) and somehow it just stuck. I've been trying to think of how the cow (and my title) really makes any sense at all. And I think I've come up with a pretty "sense" making reason.

Cows go moo. there are millions of cows in the world. they all look the same. they all eat the same thing. they all make the same noise. kind of like humans you think? i'm just one in all those millions who's trying to be heard. I'm just "mooing", if you will (that sounds real special haha).

convinced? i won't be offended if you're not. i feel like i've changed the name and look of my blog so many times that i need to just stick to one. Any suggestions on a new title? A new image? if you've got a good one i might just take the plunge and redo things even more :)

one week of school = one week of vacation. sounds about right

This week has seriously flown by. Holy cow. I've had a few breakdowns this week, but after many talks and much complaining to the amazing people in my life (aka mom, boyfriend, roomies), I finally feel a little bit better about things. I think maybe, just maybe, I can make it. Grad school may take me to the edge of insanity, but when I'm done it will be so worth it (at least I hope so....haha)

On another note, I'm super excited that it's Friday. I get to pick Jantz and his fam up from the airport tonight and then spend the whole week with them. They leave on Thursday, but, I get to fly back with them and spend next weekend out there! yay!

I would pretty much be ok if the weekend never ended. so pray that this week goes by super slow for me :)

Song-of-the-Week: The Only Exception by Paramore. All you need is one person to change all your ideas and rules about love.

P.S. Impromptu Painting-of-the-Week:

death of the virgin by Caravaggio

such a spectacular painting. i stood in front of it for so long. just marveling at its beauty. 

it's SO different in person (so go see it :). and love it.

schoolio

the dreaded/anticipated grad school has finally arrived.

and i'm surprisingly super excited

the question is, whether i'm really going to commit myself to the hard work, sleepless nights, endless research, and really create something that i'm proud of.

no more coasting

no more going with the flow

no more mediocrity

only dedication, quality, going the extra mile

and most of all, excitement about all of it.

i have to admit, i'm scared to succeed. terrified even. i'm way too ok with just "doing my best" and being ok with whatever results come out of it. because if i don't put my all into something, then i know i can't expect amazing results. i've always hated this about myself.

so grad school can not longer be just a means to an end. it is now a challenge. to myself. to make expectations high, and do all i can to achieve them. which means believing in myself like i never have before.

but i can do it right? it is possible?

way back when

I was looking through some of my old posts today

and I decided to go all the way back to the beginning.

July 15th, 2005.

WHOA

that's 5 years ago people.

i don't even know if i could pick 5-years-ago me out of a crowd.

(ok that's a little extreme)

but really. i was just a little girl then.

i knew nothing about life.

nothing about who i was.
nothing about love (especially about love).

nothing about the journey i was about to embark on.

i was so innocent and naive.

you may be tempted to go find my first post and read it,
but for my sake, don't do it :)

but, looking back isn't for nothing.

i can see how far i've come. how much i've learned. how much i've experienced.

and you know what?

it makes me excited for all that i have yet to learn.

and it also gives me something to look back on and laugh. a lot.

muffins muffins

After much lusting, I finally made "Muffins that Taste like Donuts" (enticing name i know). They were pretty delicious, they barely lasted the weekend.

and, i documented the whole experience :)

my dinner whilst making muffins. college student? i think so

the ingredients

my AMAzing kitchen aid

 mixing it all together

 some suga

 all ready for the oven

 almost done

 after a dip in some melted butter and cinnamon-sugar, they look like this

and then they were eaten all gone :)

a pet peeve

when someone is writing on a whiteboard and, 

instead of using the provided eraser, 

they for some unknown reason 

erase with their finger/hand/any part of their body.

Does this bother anyone else?
I mean, the eraser is there for a reason.
Do you know how many hand oils you leave on the whiteboard?
Not to mention all the dry-erase marker residue that is left on your hand? (and sometimes people forget and touch their face, leaving marker all over their face.)
It could all just so easily be avoided if they would just use the eraser.

Ok I'm done ranting for the day :)  

Do you guys have weird pet peeves?

a little jungle book

i should preface this by explaining that sometimes when there's a break in conversation

i'll randomly sing or hum 
"...I will go and fetch the water..." from the Jungle Book
but only that line. because those are the only words i remember.
because sometimes awkward singing is better than silence.

so...Jantz sent me this cute text the other morning:

"I will go and fetch the water :)"

It doesn't seem like much, but it made me molto happy (look, some italian skills shining through).
it just goes to show how lucky i am to have a guy who not only loves me despite some odd behavior,
but he knows just what will make me smile.
and it pretty much made my day.

a funny

How is your week going? 

Mine is going exactly as it usually does on a Tuesday, which is almost as bad as a Monday (we are only sometimes friends), only a little better.

But actually..............today has been really good so far (other than work is going super slow). I've been letting the little things get to me recently (good little things=the BEST and very ok. bad little things = the WORST),

but today i'm all about the big picture.

Now I can't wait to go home, 

talk to the boyfriend about happy things, 

eat some dinner and chocolate, 

and hopefully watch How I Met Your Mother with my awesome roommates. 

Oh and bask in the fact that I am done with homework and school for three weeks.

AND, you should all read this because i think it's funny, and also so true.

Song-O-the-Week: She's in Love with the Boy by Trisha Yearwood. I hadn't heard this song in so long until it randomly popped into my head last week. So naturally I had to remind you all about it.

one year

Sunday marked one year of being with this guy:

(is it creepy that i love to watch him sleep? it just makes my heart melt a little bit.)

he's pretty much the most amazing person i've ever met.

and he makes me smile every single day.
he constantly amazes me,
be it with how hard he works
or how many times a day he lets me know how much he cares.

we've stuck together through so many obstacles,
and you know what?
not once has he ever lost sight of the future.
of our future.
he gives me such good perspective on life.

i don't know where i would be
without his love and encouragement.
i can't wait for many more years
of celebrating love and happiness with
my very best friend.

love you tons and tons

Birthday Girl

Today is my amazing
froommate's
(friend + roommate. that's right derek, i have stolen your word)

BIRTHDAY!!!

She really is freaking amazing. I'm oh so lucky to have her as a roomie.

just look at how cute she is.
she's just as sweet as she looks, even when i make a mess in the kitchen :)

us at my surprise birthday last year.
only a really great friend would befriend your mom
to participate in a surprise party.

she loves food, just like me

oh and she's gorgeous

Ria, I hope this day is full of fun and happiness.
I love you to pieces!

H A P P Y B I R T H D A Y

my first official meal in who knows how long

This is a little late, but last Sunday I made dinner. A real dinner. Like with pots and pans and spices.

unfortunately i thought of taking pictures only after everything was all cleaned up and put away. and let me tell you, if you had seen the kitchen right after everything was done, you would have been appalled. I made quite a mess (i haven't cooked in a long time alright? i'm not accustomed to all the multitasking yet). Don't worry, it didn't get this bad, only pretty close...despite the appearance of the stove, the food looked delish (if i do say so myself). The chicken looked the best. with the spices and browning from the pan. very nice. and the pasta, well, was pasta from a box, but it tasted good, so, whatevs. i was pretty proud of myself

before i began my cooking adventure i delved into more familiar territory, baking (i heart baking). I made oreo truffles. which, truth be told, is not baking, because nothing goes in the oven. but boy were they delicious. and now i can't wait to go home to eat one :)

(not mine, but close enough :)

Next time I'm taking pictures for sure.